Title: Retrace
Author: Sigal Ehrlich
Release Date: November 6, 2014
Genre: New Adult Romance
Blurb
Nia Martins believes a fresh start will help her leave her traumatic past behind. Moving to a different country, she seeks to shake off her demons by doing the one thing that sets her free from her destructive thoughts – teaching dance. But change doesn't come easy, and all Nia really wants is to take the next breath without the perpetual suffocation that follows.
Reeves Mitchell has looked death in the eyes so many times it’s become habitual. That is, until his best friend's life was on the line. When the one thing he feared the most turns into reality, all he can do is pick up the pieces of his loss. As Reeves tries to live with the constant thought of “what if” gnawing at the back of his mind, he persistently and steadily builds a thick wall around himself.
Their solitary lives are all they have—until fate brings them together. Nia and Reeves’ new friendship helps make life, shadowed by the ghosts of their past, more bearable. But as their relationship deepens and new, suppressed feelings emerge between them, are they willing to retrace their steps back to where wounded hearts can be broken once more?
Prologue
Reeves
~3 years ago, somewhere near Lake Erie, Ohio
My heart drums in my ears, beating fast and hard. I’m poised. My face reveals nothing. No stress, no panic, not so much as a twitch of a muscle or a bead of sweat. I do this thing I’ve mastered throughout the years. I hold my eyes cold and calculated – they tell nothing. I look the dark, bearded man before me square in the eyes, waiting. No matter what, I cannot blow my cover. We, that is, Ben who’s sitting on the sofa opposite me and I, can’t reveal our cover no matter what the cost. I inwardly repeat: there are thousands of lives on the line.
“Did you think you could pull it off?” the man asks. He has a deep scar across his prickled cheek and he holds a semi-automatic at my best friend Ben’s temple. “We are on to you, you son of a bitch.” He grits his teeth and kicks Ben full in the ribs.
Ben groans and my gut wrenches viciously. We manage to exchange a concealed glance between us, a flit glance that says so much, a look that feels more like a goodbye. I take inner deep breaths and summon every bit of willpower I have to stay still. A strong intuition brews within me. Something terrible is about to happen. My entire body throbs with dread. And there’s absolutely nothing I can fucking do. Nothing! At the back of our minds we’ve always known, Ben and I. Something like this could happen to either of us, if not both of us.
I’ve looked death in the eyes so many times it’s become habitual. But this time I’m petrified because it’s not my life that’s at risk, it’s my best friend who I’ve known for the last fifteen years that’s in real danger. There’s more talking in this Middle Eastern language that I’m fluent in. Words pronounced deeper in the throat are barked at Ben. I hear but I don’t listen. Inside I’m numb. I know what’s coming is inevitable, and with each ticking of the clock the anxiety within me grows. Both tanned, solemn men give me another assessing scan just to make sure they are right, that I truly am one of them.
With a small confirming nod from the guy in the expensive suit who is sitting on the plush sofa across the misty room, the gun goes off once.
For a beat, before mourning enfolds me, I’m paralyzed. I look at the scene before me, because I know I’m expected to. It could be some sick initiation I’m supposed to pass. I look, but I look through it, I don’t see it. I’m playing a part. I’m on a mission that can save many civilian lives. That’s what’s holding me back from losing control and exacting merciless retribution for Ben’s life. I cannot break down. I cannot blow this thing up. Instead, I keep my face placid, slouching back in the chair, looking the killer straight in the eyes. As Ben’s body drops, my heart stops.
With his last breath, I know my life would never be the same.
Prologue
Nia
~3 years ago, Fortaleza, Brazil
My eyes are swollen. The purple-black marks have faded some, but nevertheless they are still evident on my face. I study my image as it reflects in my notebook’s screen and wince. I carefully touch my lip with the pads of my fingers. It’s still tender and has a sickening iron taste to it. My other hand instinctively reaches for my bandaged ribs. No matter how deep the pain I’m still nursing, or the way I look, I still want him next to me. Nothing has changed, I love him just the same. Nothing has changed, at least not for me.
The sound of the front door opening pulls me back from my thoughts. There’s a jingle of keys as they land in the glass bowl, I listen for the familiar call, asking if I’m home, but it doesn’t come. My brows knit as I wait.
I shrug and call out, “I’m in here.”
In place of an answer there’s a low exchange of words. I can’t make out what’s being said, but the tone itself seeds alarm within me. Footsteps climb the stairs to the second floor of the house.
My parents appear at my door and my heart faints at their expressions. Color has left their faces. But it’s what echoes from their eyes that sucks the air right out of me – a dual vision of fatality.
“Nia, it’s… Patrick,” My mom’s voice breaks as she tries to speak.
“They found him earlier…” My dad finishes.
Their lips keep moving but the sounds coming out of their mouths are stretched and heavy, as if they are speaking under water. My mother’s teary eyes caress me. She moves her hand to mine and I flinch back. I shake my head violently from side to side.
“No. No…. No, no, no, no, no.” I bring my hand to cover my mouth, muffling the hysterical sounds coming out. “No, no, no, it can’t be,” I repeatedly murmur. They both look at me in pain, hopeless. I shake my head and move back on my bed, digging into the corner with my feet, resembling a scared animal. My tears almost choke me, and my body shakes uncontrollably.
“It can’t be…” I whisper, my words breaking at the tail end of my sentence.
“He is gone, Nia love. He is gone.” My mother’s words are so soft but yet so powerful, they paralyze me. Something takes over me in a sudden ferocious flash. Something resilient, spreading to every part of me.
Guilt.
And with his last breath, I know my life would never be the same.
About the Author
Guest post ‘My inspiration for Retrace’
"I can’t put my finger on
anything specific that inspired me to write RETRACE. It was more a blend of
many things that eventually grew into a story about letting go and learning to
love and accept. Some of the key elements that did inspire me though, were a
few crazy, vivid dreams that eventually turned into scenes, music, a lot of
music, and mainly the characters themselves. Reeves and Nia practically seized
my mind to the point I couldn't concentrate on anything else and just had to
pour their story out of me. The book traces their hesitant journey into deep
friendship that helps them cope with traumatic pasts, and gradually leads them
to discover the path to heal and accept. As Nia and Reeves’ characters developed
into people I believed my readers would feel strongly about, and connect with,
in tandem the story took shape into an emotional ride with touches of angst,
humor, suspense and a whole lot of steam…"
1.1)
“He
dismantles me, slowly and painstakingly. Layer after layer, he peels off my
barriers and clothes until I’m naked—physically and emotionally, naked. I am
completely bared before him, body and soul. It's a blanket he covers me with,
but I know it's his heart that wraps me to truly feel as warm and
protected as I finally do.”
2. 2) “Hey.
I’m the neighbor from upstairs, can I borrow some sex?”
3. 3) “I think I’ve just fallen deeper in friendship with
you.”
“You’ve been in
friendship with me?”
“Hopelessly…”
4. 4) “Her eyes are indeed
strikingly beautiful, but they seem to be in some perpetual mourning, even when
she smiles. Ironically so, just like mine.”
5. 5) “He made me look at the world with brighter colors.
I feel whole again, as much as one can truly feel whole when a piece of your
heart was taken away for good.”
Excerpt
“So, for the sake of proper conduct, Miss Mitchell,” I send out
my hand for a shake, “you know my name…”
She observes my offered palm for a short moment, and fills it
with her soft one. Bare, groomed fingernails, just the way I like. In unison
our stares drop to where our palms link. Something’s happening there, something
that produces energy with unworldly speed.
“Miss Mitchell,” she says, prompting our stares to re-meet. Her
expression a transparent tease. I nod, amusement playing on my face.
“Well, we’ve crossed nudity off the list, so I guess it’s safe
to say we should be okay on a first name basis…”
She mirrors my glee. “It’s Nia.”
Nia. I repeat her name in my head. Everything about her is just
what I like, neat and natural, and absolutely gorgeous. All the good reasons
for me to get the hell out of here.
“It was a pleasure,” I say and send her a wicked grin.
She sighs with a smile, in a “what’s done is done, I can’t take
it back,” kind of shy way.”
I’m Begging You
Not To Go – Tired Pony
This is War –
Thirty Seconds to Mars
In a Bar – Tango
With Lions
Secretly – Skunk
Anansie
Break Me Down-
Red
Am I Wrong – Nico
& Vinz
Little Lion Man –
Mumford & Sons
Angel – Massive
Attack
Toy Soldiers –
Martika
Battle Cry –
Imagine Dragons
Lemon Tree – Fools Garden
Little Blue
Mailbox – Fink
Angles Of The
Silence – Counting Crows
Human – Christina
Perri
Giveaway!
Enter to win a $200 Amazon Gift Card or a Signed Paperback
3 Stars
Sigal Ehrlich gives us two scarred and broken characters. Each living day to day with the ghosts of their pasts haunting them. Both unable to shed the despair and guilt that continues as they attempt to move forward.
Reeves Mitchell, retired FBI agent, continues to fight an internal battle. A battle which drives and fuels his emotions. His sense of honor is becoming intensely fierce as he wars with choosing between his duty to avenge the murder of his best friend, and then the duty to move on and protect.
Nia Martins, is looking for a fresh start. She leaves her Brazilian home after a horrific and fatal family incident, which left her inundated with guilt. Using her mother's maiden name she is now Nia Mitchell, dance teacher, neighbour and soon to become the "friendly" neighbour.
Both Mitchell's first encounter was an Oscar worthy scene. It was sexy, hilarious, cocky, and filled with suspense. Reeves did not disappoint in his reaction, especially being male. And Nia, well Nia just made it even funny with her little quips.
Now this is where it started to waver for me (The book cover and synopsis intrigued me. The prologue enticed and excited my reading powers *got all wiggly and tingly*). Entering the fourth chapter, I kept convincing myself “the story” will drop and I’ll be blown away. So when I got to 56% and nothing happens. Just two main characters dancing around each other, becoming friendly and “friendlier,” what should a girl do???
I loved that the prelude to their friendship was well established. However, it was too lengthy and because of this it was slow and uneventful for me. It was a push to continue to be honest.
At 65-70% is where the story started to become interesting. Thank God for Katie. She added some spunk and dynamics to the story. Katie is the obsessed little sister to Reeves murdered, best friend, Ben. She's been in love with Reeves, forever. When she realizes that Reeves and Nia's friendship has become sexual and especially when Nia is invited over for dinner with the family, that's when Katie steps in to put Nia in her place. Katie in no uncertain terms, informs Nia that her "relationship" with Reeves is nothing more than him passing time.That Katie and Reeves are awaiting the perfect time to be together.
This revelation slowly destroyed Nia as she continues to replay every instance her and Reeves have been together and he always had to leave because one name always pops up "Katie." She can't love and lose again. Especially knowing that slowly he was putting her back together again.
This status update from Katie further seals the deal for Nia, when Reeves continues to be sincere when they're in bed and alone, with all his sweet and supporting words.
Then he quickly reverts in public to introducing and emphasizing the term "friendship" or "neighbour"to everyone. Like really dude!!! WTF!!! Get an effing clue.
Reeves knows Nia is more to him than a friend and a neighbour. But he can't or won't seem to put a label on what "it" is exactly. All he knows is that
*ARC provided by Love Between the Sheets on behalf of the author for an honest review*
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